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Ahoy
by Guest Columnist “Jolly Roger” Dory Reefingline
A
Quick Guide To Sailors:
The many and varied species of sailors that inhabit our
waterfront are an interesting form of wildlife for amateur study. This
Quick Guide is designed to help beginners identify the most common
species. For more information about the less common sailors and to
distinguish between sub-species, consult “Field Guide To The Eastern
Sailor,” by “Jolly Roger” Dory Reefingline.
Each species is distinguished by habitat,
plumage, call, and diet. To use the guide, compare these characteristics
to the specimen under observation. In most cases, the identification of
the correct species of sailorus can be made with confidence.
A. Blond-Tufted Racer (s.
professionalis)
- Habitat: Bruce Farr Sloop
- Plumage: Sportswear monogrammed with sponsor’s logo, Harken boat
shoes.
- Call: “We need to build three new sails and re-fair the keel for
tomorrow morning.”
- Diet: Power Bars, Foster’s Beer.
B. Tawny Racer-Cruiser (s. competitorus)
- Habitat: J-Boat
- Plumage: Sportswear monogrammed with yacht name, Sperry Topsiders.
- Call: “Whitney got an overide on the guy and we lost 6 boat lengths
before it was cleared.”
- Diet: Turkey Sandwich/Beck’s Beer.
C. Red-Bottomed Cruiser-Racer (s.
gregarious)
- Habitat: Sabre
- Plumage: Sportswear monogrammed with manufacturer’s logo, Sebago
Docksides.
- Call: “Muffy, is the spinnaker still in the trunk of the Mercedes?”
- Diet: Broccoli quiche/Perrier.
D. Broad-Tailed Cruiser (s.
paterfamilias)
- Habitat: Hinkley
- Plumage: Sportswear monogrammed with wearer’s initials, Lands’ End
Boat Shoes.
- Call: “Is there any place to buy ice on the Isle of Shoals?”
- Call: “Bar Harbor is so touristy in August!”
- Diet: Tuna ceviche, chilled sauvignon blanc.
E. Gray Salt (s. ancientmarinerus)
- Habitat: Traditional type, e.g. catboat, Friendship sloop
- Plumage: flannel shirt, jeans, leather work boots.
- Call: “Some damn fool yachtie ran his fancy sailboat onto Smith
Reef!”
- Diet: Dinty Moore Beef Stew/Old Milwaukee Beer.
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Editor's
Note: “Jolly Roger” Dory Reefingline is the nom de plume of
Peter Vanderwaart who is the moderator of the Yahoo discussion group on
boat design:
https://groups.yahoo.com/group/boatdesign/ |